October is for Lovers


Who would have thought a Grave Yard loving country-turned city girl would have to travel hundreds of miles to meet her Prince Charming ?

I hope this story doesn't disappoint , as it is pretty much the same kind as most. Hopefully the clothes might give a chuckle anyway :)
Our meeting was one of random perfection you might say and yet as ordinary as the sunset. Though that can be miraculous, depending on your view ;)

I was a dork ..........
He was not .............

It all started as I believe all great loves start, when you're totally unaware and not looking for it. And when you're in a place of self-acceptance.

I was dating a "stepping-stone" guy when I met him. We became instant friends and companions long before we realized we were falling hard for each other. I had been married (for about 5 minutes) in my early 20's and we met in our late 20's. I had only lived in Cincy for a year or so (my exodus from the boonies) , and was still a wide-eyed grain-fed country girl. He was a God. Well, I mean he was darn pretty ;)
I never thought someone so handsome would give me a second glance , much less want to live with me forever, AND we were the same age ( I usually went for older men, a long and boring issue concerning self-esteem ).

We started going to concerts together, visiting each other every chance we got, and unawarely quit smoking at the same time (which we started back together as well ). I liked to have him over to cook for him, and my "other" boyfriend and he would play guitar together. We started slipping away together without said "boyfriend" and spending more time alone. Needless to say, one day after a walk in the cemetery, he leaned in for a kiss , and I bolted like a crazy loony. How did I miss It ? He was in love with me and I with him.

I finally got the courage to end the "stepping -stone" relationship and take the biggest risk of my life. As risks go, this may not seem big to you, but it was huge to me. 
You see, I had been hurt . A Lot. I was in an abusive relationship when I was 17, and the scars weren't closed. I had health issues that couldn't be ignored.  Baggage comes in all forms and my suitcase was overflowing to put it mildly. 

He didn't care. It didn't matter. He loved me. For ME. Baggage and all, the entire package. As I would, and still find out every day, Love is blind to those kind of things. Love knows no boundaries, no flaws, no fault . It only knows Beauty. Friendship. Trust. And the biggest of all for us, Faith.

We both lived in separate apartments for a year. I had to do this, as I needed to know I could "make-it" on my own. That I was a grown-up, for you see, I had always leaned on my parents or a man to provide me shelter. I had to do this before I could continue to grow and would not be the woman who leans on others to take care of her. It was tough, but well worth it. I was poor in "stuff" but rich in Love :)

We got an apartment together exactly on year later and lived together for 5 years. A huge old one-bedroom with hardwood floors, 2 cats. We still feel like it is home.
One New Year's eve, while eating at our favorite restaurant, I was applying lipstick, digging around my purse, I looked up and he was gone. 
He was one one knee beside the table holding a ring ...........................
I was so stunned, I left my Hubs-to-be sitting in a holding pattern wondering what to do :)  I snapped back into reality long enough for a firm YES, hug and kisses !  The entire restaurant cheered (just like in the movies)  and we were married the same year in October . The rest is history!  We honeymooned in San Diego and bought our house 10 years ago.

( Since this is a style blog, ;) I'll reveal a few tid-bits about our wedding. My dress was not my original dress. It was fashioned from 2 dresses, one silk ~ one lace, but I didn't try it on til 2 days before, and it was way too small ! So, I scrambled around and found this one at the last minute (thanks, Dillard's) ~ The home we were married in was an older Victorian-style and the walls were a muted pumpkin color (how convenient ;) . It was sunset, cream candles were the only lighting. My bouquet was filled with ivy and the stoop welcomed everyone with hoards of pumpkins. I walked down the stairs to Neil Young and the Moody Blues. We all stood together when we said our vows, and tears flowed like champaign :)
Many still say, it was the most beautiful wedding they've ever been to. It didn't cost a lot and my dress was "off-the-rack".
It just goes to show that you don't have to spend thousands of dollars to have a beautiful wedding.

We have been through many trials and errors during our time together. Some very fearful times and some of the most joyful times of my life.
He has taught me the difference between 'good music' and noise :) 
He introduced me to film noir and helped build my love of great writing / directing. He says I have taught him how to be goofy and that cool comes in many forms ;) Like Me :)

He has taught me the power of words, and to speak them as if they contain power, but at the same time he can pull me back into reality with his simple, yet very effective  "Joke em' if they can't take a f#*k" ;)
He still teaches me something new all the time. He still can surprise me. He is my best friend. He is my lover. He is my Husband.

I tried to make this as short and sweet as possible. I could gush and describe this journey for days ;)
Here are some more photos of our times together. You will notice, we love the beach and nature. 

our first "official" date, 1993?, The Nutcracker.
At my first apartment. He will die that I showed this!
Our first trip to the beach :)
Early 90's fashion ;)
"Big Pink" - another story for another day :)
Our boy, Rex, a six-toed cat-in-a-dog suit, RIP.
( Never trust a man who doesn't like cats ;)
In his apartment ~ Boy, he really didn't like to dress up ! ( Me in my high-waist cut-offs and leggings )

I didn't realize Rex and Bitty had "come of age" til it was too late ;)
A w w w w w ......... !!!

 Time has a way of moving very fast, but I will have to say, these past 18 or so years have been the best of my life :)

 And that's a peek into our love story. 
1993 - Forever .
Awwww.........  :)


Pull Your Socks Up! said...

What a beautiful love story. It's very touching and personal so you are very generous in sharing the thoughts and feelings you experienced. I adore the pix and the wedding photos are gorgeous - you both look so in love, thoughtful and happy. I wish I had as many old pix of me in various stages of my life as you do. It's wonderful to look back. But the best pix are of you today gorgeous woman, you are more beautiful now than ever and your husband and you are very lucky to have found one another and have such a deep, lasting love. Thanks so much for sharing:). And thank you for your lovely comments too. xoxo

Anonymous said...

Reva--this is what I've been waiting for. My marriage is my second round and I guess I wanted to make mental comparisons about our experiences. Your story about the need to be on your own sounds very similar. I had to get to the point that I knew I could support myself and my three kids BEFORE I would even consider dating again. I had lots of baggage too, but we should probably e-mail for me to share much more.

the setting for your wedding is gorgeous. Your dress is lovely and I loved this phrase, "the tears flowed like champagne." He has taught you the power of words.

It's also interesting to see snapshots of you both through time. I've been pondering the wisdom of doing something like that on my blog.

Vintage Vixen said...

What a truly beautiful post, Reva. You can see that you both clearly adore one another and I really think you look even more beautiful as you've grown older.
Here's to another 18 years! xxx
PS You're right, I'd NEVER trust a non-cat lover, male or female. xxx

Bonnie said...

Reva, such a beautiful and moving post. Love Story has nothing on you guys!

Some of your words are true poetry: Love knows no boundaries, no flaws, no fault -or- random perfection -or- Baggage comes in all forms and my suitcase was overflowing -AND I loved this one - wide-eyed grain-fed country girl!

I never trust anyone who doesn't like animals period! Thanks so much for sharing your special moments with us!

~Bonnie xxx

jlag said...

I loved reading your love story. Thanks for the glimpse into your life.

Disco Goth said...

Aww, that's so lovely =)

Lesa said...

Reva, How romantic, love the pics, what a great love story!

SomeoneLikeYou said...

Okay Reva, this was such an absolutely INCREDIBLE POST! It was so touching it made me want to cry. Wow, seriously, just thank you so much for sharing your wonderful love journey with all of us! I always love to see people so in love from the time they met,still be so in love years and years later. You and your husband are such the perfect models for true love. I wish you both the best, and I am truly so happy for you.

P.S. You look SO gorgeous in your wedding photos. Literally jaw dropping gorgeous!

Lady Cardigan said...

Lovely. Thank you for sharing. It brightened up my evening.

Anonymous said...

This was lovely,, thank you for sharing-- you have made a beautiful life w/ your sweetie & seem so happy together...

may it last forever!!

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