What is it really ? And am i one ???
Ever since this question has been presented to me, i have honestly had a tough time even defining the word. I've always considered myself a humanitarian, an animal rights activist, and an advocate for people with disabilities, but the word 'feminist' seemed to bring back thoughts of the bra-burning, equal pay, equal rights, my body-my-choice 70's....
So, on a day, when i was practicing my portrait-taking skills, and wearing make-up and the most feminine outfit i've worn in a while ;) - i decided to look backward, and in doing so, i might figure out what feminism means to me today .....
I grew up in a very small town, smack-dab in the middle of the bible belt. A place where men were men and women knew their 'place'. I learned at a very early age that girls played with dolls and boys liked trucks. Period.
So why did i like rocks, dirt and the occasional play-ground scuffle ?
Don't get me wrong, i dug "Barbie" ( whom i now call "the devil" ),
but thought that was just me being a bit strange. So, i became a cheerleader, hoped to marry a doctor, and blended.
Fast-forward to high school, the 80's. During this time, i began to rebel as most do. I was still a band-geek, but also loved to hang out on the smoking patio. ( yep, that was the eighties ;) - the decade of decadence.
I quickly morphed into a Madonna-Prince hybrid. My 'insides' were another story.
I found that i was a lot like this rock, all shiny on the outside,
but very raw and simple on the inside.
I became a wild child. I thought i knew what was what.
Now some people need a simple nudge to wake up, while other's need a boulder to hit them on the head. I was the latter ....
One night at a party, i was almost raped. I thought it was my fault for
being drunk. "Whew, close call" or so i thought. Boys will be boys....
I didn't dare tell .....
I found myself in an abusive relationship soon after.
He said it was my fault and always swore he'd never hurt me again....
The black eyes didn't make me leave, however. It was the cheating.
No one could understand how i could have allowed myself to be treated in such a way. But i could. I thought i was ugly and didn't deserve to be treated in any other way. I did vow, however, that no man would ever get close enough to me to hurt me ever again. Ever...
For many years thereafter, i found thousands of ways to abuse myself.
Go figure !
It has been through many years of pain, then growth, that a gift of freedom and acceptance has been given to me by women who have been there themselves. But not only by women, but men who are also feminists. Who believe in me and have taught me the value of each and every woman in the world.
Am i a feminist ???
Let me answer that with a quote :
"Remember no one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
ATTIRE: DIY PENDANT, MADE FROM A ROCK
SKIRT: OSCAR DE LARENTA, THRIFTED AND NEW
SWEATER: LIMITED,THRIFTED _ TEE: THRIFTED
NECKLACE: 1928, RETIRED